Family Food Traditions

Oh the food traditions we all have within our families.... memories of that favorite meal served every special birthday or the Christmas Eve versus Christmas Day Dinners and why they mattered so much to repeat the same special dishes year after year served on the same family platters carved by the same grandpa or dad or older brother.  My family is no exception to this heart warming routine.  I wanted to share a few of our favorites that my family has held tightly for so many years and suggest a few ways you can start your own family food traditions if you don't have any old ones to cherish.

COOKBOOKS
The year after my mom passed I decided to gather together our family favorites and created a cookbook for the family.  I made spiral bound  copies for each of my older brothers & their wives, and for my dad.  I sent copies to cousins and shared a few with friends. 

So, I will share my most favorite recipe from the book of all time, which is my dad's onion soup recipe... the secret is the Dijon Mustard at just the right time.....

Sweet Onions simmering down slowly- the longer you wait the sweeter they get, it helps to cover them so they don't caramelize as fast, keep adding butter too if they start sticking

Disclaimer:  This recipe is not for those who cannot have wine, it does all get cooked out but
you simply cannot make this without it.

Dad's soup is rather easy..... 6 large sweet onions (vidalias if you can get them).  Saute them in a half of a stick of butter covered for 10-15 minutes before they caramelize but ensure they are completely soft and ready to be eaten.  Add in at least 3 T of Dijon  mustard and mix until well blended (don't change it to yellow mustard, trust me - it will not be the same at all!).  Deglaze the pan with 1/3 of a bottle (at least) of a good white wine (my dad used to use Calvados, I prefer a decent Ecco Domani Pinot Grigio).  Reduce to half (add more if you'd like, and sip some for yourself) then stir in a quart of homemade stock (it is so worth the effort to do it homemade but if you must buy it from a store -go with organic, free range, low sodium.... it is worth it!).  Be sure to add in some dried thyme to taste and salt and pepper.  I toss in a bouquet garni of my favorite herbs as well.  You can eat this as is right away, or simmer for the day and serve..... of course you can do it the old fashioned way and put the soup into a broiler safe bowl and add a crouton or slice of French crusty bread and top with some great shredded swiss cheese.  This freezes really well too!  Play with the amounts based on whether you like rich butteryness or more wine or less broth or more mustard... I change it up every time.

My fridge with homemade sauce, homemade onion soup and also some
Strawberry Poppyseed Vinaigrette that I made for a Food Swap last Spring. 

Speaking of freezable, my homemade tomato sauce is wonderfully easy and so versatile.  I don't have any family handed down recipe and I do something slightly different every time but I always, ALWAYS always use either San Marzano tomatoes or locally grown Heirlooms..... once you do, you will never use any others again either.  (And substituting honey for sugar is a nice touch and add a splash of a good balsamic at the end as well!)

Ingredients laid out for my homemade sauce/gravy

Some of my other treasured cookbooks that were passed on to me are pictured below, I am sure you will recognize a few of them and a couple of unique others you may not have known existed....

 





 

OF COURSE I have a Melting Pot cookbook, don't you???  This was a gift from the corporate head chef of Melting Pot & Front Burner brands for those of us who attended a charity cooking class in 2012, they sell it at all the restaurants and if you know me at all, you'd know this has been and always will be my favorite restaurant.  Ever.

The Dallas Cowboys Cookbook was a gift from my hubby -how can you go wrong with America's team doling out great eats?!!!

RECIPE CARDS
My family had so many food traditions and recipes handed down- I am blessed.  Today I keep some of the handwritten cards and pieces of paper on a magnetic frame on the wall to remind me of my dear Mother, Grandmothers and cherished Aunts and all of the memories that these recipes bring back to me when I glance their way.

Aunt Stella Grabinski's Delectable Rich Chocolate Cake, A.K.A. "Better than Sex Cake" 

 

Grandma Helen Sniegocki's Homemade Pickles, yum!

And my successful attempts at making homemade pickles with a slight deviation from Grandma's instructions but still are fantastic, right Renee Brown???! ;)

 

No need to do fancy canning techniques here, just be sure to keep in the fridge and they are good for a year!

Time and time again I have carefully lifted one of the handwritten recipes down and followed it even when I knew the steps by heart (can't you tell from the splatters and drips on the cards :)).  Recently I copied several of these special recipes into a brand new homemade cookbook for my niece who just moved into her first apartment on her own and on her way to starting her own traditions.  I asked my sister in-laws and mother-in-laws for some of their special recipes to include as well so she has a place to cherish those handwritten cards as I do with my own.  She was so thrilled to receive this book!  Plus, when I opened up one of my old cookbooks to see if it was one she might like to have as well a post it note fell out- and quite to my surprise I read through teary eyes this sweet note from mom that I probably have not seen in about 15 years...... When did you last thumb through your old recipe boxes, you might find a surprise waiting in yours too!

LISTS
One of the neat things that I garnered from my mother (no doubt) is my love of list-making.  I consistently make lists for every single occasion I am hosting, every trip I take, every holiday, every day that starts out with a "Oh boy, I better get going...lots to do."  I have found some great tools to help me and although some of my lists overlap and are duplicated (like the 4 calendars I keep in various places) it helps me stay on track.  We all get a little pleasure out of checking something off a list or crossing it out.... But me?  I get a smile out of creating a nice and neat new list with less scratches and checks with more space to add new things because I completed others.  As a side notes here are some awesome tools that I have found useful to my family:

• The free notes app on the ipad:  Looks like a yellow legal pad but it saves automatically and easily emails my list to whomever I want it to go to.  This is used primarily for my always ready at hand pre-done lists like packing for trips, list of travel rewards account numbers, list of movies I want to rent, etc. 
• Onenote is a fantastic free app that can also be used on the web version among whomever you want to share your notes with.  My husband and I love being able to update our own and each other's honey-do lists for the house or for our business in real time so we know when someone has already completed something.  There are a lot more features that program has too so check it out.   Beware if you use different versions of windows someone may have to only use the web version - the app itself though it great regardless which platform you use.
• Google calendar- although not technically a "list" tool- it is wonderful because I can share in real time events with my hubby and we can access it from anywhere we want plus I can print out a hard copy for the fridge during those months when there are way too many things to keep track of and particularly whether the event is personal, for business, for volunteering, etc.
• Plain old notepads- And lots of 'em.  I still make handwritten lists for groceries (only to type them up in aisle order if I'm sending the hubby out for a particular errand day).... notepads are my go to for quick lists of the next 5 things I need to remember to do before I leave my desk for the day or as a reminder of the 4 things I need to bring with me for errands or visiting someone.

Why do lists tie in nicely to my family food traditions- you may be wondering?  I came across some lists my mother had smartly kept in her recipe box for years that I did not know about until I inherited her recipe boxes along with my great-grandmother's gorgeous antique dining room table and hutch.  I found cards with the measurements of the table and which tablecloths fit depending on how large we "opened" the table up for guests.  She paired colors along with lace runners and listed how many boards should go into place when we cranked open the well constructed table. 

 

Now I pull those cards out every Thanksgiving & Christmas along with the sweet "Give Thanks" sign that my nieces Selby & Sage made for me one year.  The letters are made from various seeds, nuts and other natural pieces. 

 

It is a fun tradition that my entire family has to come to our house for Thanksgiving for many years now, enjoy each others company, and eat in time to watch the Dallas Cowboys devour whomever is for dessert that year.  Read further to learn how we started some new traditions with this too!

 

The most sentimental list (and food list making tradition) I came across from my mom was for Christmas 1998.  None of us had any idea it was to be her last Christmas as she was in remission at the time.  My husband and I were also celebrating our first Christmas as a married couple and we used our brand new video camera to record the festivities.  I watch it often and cherish my mom's laughter and especially her smile while she is checking on the oven, putting on the Christmas Carol CD, and opening the door to my brothers as they "came home" that afternoon.  Seeing her writing now on the prep list she made with each item she wanted to serve from the shrimp cocktail to the pierogi dinner to the candy cane shaped rolls continuing on the next page to the cheese and egg strata and kielbasa to our wonderful tradition of Christmas Dinner complete with stuffed filet mignon.  My lists today look pretty similar when I am hosting everyone for dinner.

 

MOST SPECIAL FOOD TRADITION
Without a question though, my most favorite food tradition happens during the winter holidays.  It is sharing a Polish Christmas Wafer using Oplatek (pronounced o-plat-key) which is a thin wafer very similar to a communion wafer to be broken up into pieces and shared.  You can read more about it here and you an purchase them online or at a polish specialty food store:

Each and every single Christmas eve since I was a tiny little girl I remember my family passing around a plate of the Oplatek and as you hand it to the person next to you and break off a piece for to eat, you wish them health, happiness and special joy from your heart about the past year and the upcoming one.  When my brothers and I all moved away into our own homes, I began this same tradition at our annual holiday party we held with friends, passing the plate around the room and sharing good wishes.  In addition, my family still passes the Oplatek each year but during Thanksgiving since we usually don't see everyone at Christmas.  It is a great way to give thanks and take a moment to reflect on the blessings we have.  The kids particularly love whispering sweet blessings to each other as the wafer plate goes around the table. 

My two oldest brothers Joe and Dave sharing the Oplatek during Thanksgiving before dinner

And our precious nieces sharing blessings to each other while passing the Oplatek at Thanksgiving as well.

FAMILY FOOD BUSINESSES
My mother worked in a Bakery in the quaint town she grew up in Hackettstown, New Jersey.  In fact, my parents met while in grammar school when my father asked my mother if she needed help carrying her girl scout cookies.  My mother earned the nickname of Cookie while working in the bakery and it stuck with her the rest of her life.  Ironically when I was in high school I got a job working at a "bakery" called My Favorite Muffin.  A few years later my father debated whether to open a franchise of this cool store or to venture on his own and create his own recipes and dive head first into the restaurant world.  Dad's determination eventually led to him opening a great shop called the South'n Muffin Man in Turtle Run in Cora Springs back in 1992.  Here is a great article written about him and his shop.  My dad's Famous Blueberry Muffin recipe is below too- I think you will enjoy them. 

 

My dad found that the wholesale business for his muffins was much more profitable than running the storefront and moved to a warehouse.  In time, a businessman approached him and offered to buy the entire bay including all of the ovens, etc. and my parents decided it was time to move on and take advantage of this great deal -afterall they could always start a new shop or warehouse somewhere else with newer equipment.  Within two weeks of selling the business, my mom received word that her cancer was back and that ended up being the final time - what a blessing in disguise it was for them to sell the business just a mere few months before we lost mom -which allowed dad to be with her constantly and help support her during a time of need.  I am sure that businessman was an angel unaware to us at the perfect time.  

PHOTO BY CHAD SPENCER, Edible Sarasota Magazine Winter 2013

Then my brother Jeff took his experience in the restaurant world and was inspired to start his own food related company as well.  My middle older brother Dave helped create the software used for my brother Jeff's food delivery company in Sarasotsa called Ashley's.  They deliver great food with exceptional service to homes, businesses, events, etc.  Check out the great article here written in by Sarah Moone in Edible Sarasota Magazine about this business that he runs with my sister in law Elizabeth.  

And also check out ashleysfood.comashleysfood.com or wedeliversarasota.com for more details.

  

PIEROGIES- MOST ENDEARING FAMILY FOOD TRADITION

My grandmothers came from very different backgrounds although both lived in New Jersey most of their lives after their parents came over from Europe.  My father's family was mostly Polish and my mother's side were Ukranian.  Therefore Pierogies were a hit on both sides of the family no matter whether we called them Pit-a-hey or Pyrohy or the traditional Pierogie.  If you didn't know, Pierogies are dumplings or unleavened dough – usually boiled, and then often baked or sautéed in butter with onions – traditionally stuffed with potato filling, sauerkraut, cheese, or ground meat.   You can find them in your frozen food section or at most local Polish cafes or grocers.  My family always had the tradition of having them for Christmas eve and I continue that tradition even still- as my husband also has Polish ancestry as well.  Here is my grandmother and mom's Pierogie recipe handwritten years ago.... and some pictures I took of me making some last Christmas as well.

My Potato and Cheese pierogie prep for Christmas 2012

 

FUN WITH FOOD - Personalize it!
A fun tradition was something started in my family roughly 30 years ago..... I am not sure who started it but I'm guessing it was my mom.  We used to have "Sniegocki Scramble" taken after my maiden name.  A simple dish that was an easy go-to meal when you have 4 hungry kids.  Mom would cook up ground beef, boil some egg noodles and top it off with a little butter and cheddar cheese.... some of my brothers liked to add in ketchup, I like adding cottage cheese and my husband loves this and adds in BBQue sauce.... easy, simple and it always was a hit- the name just stuck!

STARTING NEW TRADITIONS
Since my family tries to gather at Thanksgiving now with all of the kids, grandkids, grandparents, etc and getting together a month later for Christmas is always hard being so spread around, we like to exchange Christmas presents in November instead.  A few years ago we decided with our ever growing extended families that maybe we could cut back a little.  We began a new tradition of playing secret santa and finally this past year we had a blast doing a stealing gift exchange that you may have played in your office at work or a a holiday party.  This is where you each bring a gift of a certain value all wrapped and draw numbers to take turns unwrapping a gift or "Stealing" one already opened by someone else.  It was great fun, the gifts were amusing to say the least and everyone had a ball.... we still brought gifts for all of the kids and it made it an exciting and more practical way to share.

 

 

Another idea (that I HOPE will become a new tradition vs. a one time great idea) was something my middle brother Dave brought along with his family from the Carolinas.  Dave made a homemade beer and bottled it and even labeled it especially for our family holiday celebration.  Maybe this little nudge will make it a new tradition for years to come as it was oh-so-good.  Consider getting a kit and bottling your own beer or wine or even making some jam or jelly or freezeable treats for everyone to keep after the party is over.  Wouldn't it be fun for each family as a group to make something homemade not just for a pot luck dinner but as a food gift favor and everyone will get something special to remember the time together?

My (personally newest) and fast-becoming a food tradition that you certainly should consider trying is canning.  My sister in law Elizabeth has been doing some great things on her blog and in articles she writes in Edible Sarasota magazine.  We got together one afternoon and jointly did some canning of some wonderful fresh berries in season.  I anticipate a new tradition of canning and preparing meals to swap in my future with family and neighbors and friends - what a great way to try something new with food and allow others to enjoy it as well!

 

Stirring away at the berries soon to become blueberry jam.....
 

Another idea for a new family food tradition is to do a family night of cooking together.... give the kids a few tasks and teach the hubby a couple things about making your favorite dish....(check it out via the link here: you never know, one evening he might surprise you too with something homemade, all because you showed him how.

 

 

 What are some of your favorite

family food traditions?

Lifetime Commitments

There are far too few that understand lifetime commitment, and there are too many that are unable to achieve it for various reasons -many times out of their control.  I respect those who couldn't stay with someone or something because it was not the right thing for them or unhealthy. I love so many people that had relationships end in divorce or those who sadly walked away from an organization... and many times those people found great happiness with someone or something new and it was meant to be. 

What does bother me are those who say that being in a sorority is something they "did" while in college.  Why the past tense?  Far too many who pledged and vowed to be a sister or brother for life and who "left" "dropped out" or ceased to be interested as an alumnae once they graduated.  Many of those who were never in a fraternity of any kind rely on stereotypes and movies and bad press on instances of hazing or alcohol abuse without seeing the forest for the trees.   Granted it is not for everyone and those who did have a negative experience certainly are smart to walk away from something not good for them.  For those who never went to college or didn't join for various reasons  may find an opportunity to join as an alum initiate or to join other fraternal organizations such as Knights of Columbus, Junior League or Women's clubs or the Masons.   My sorority even has alumnae initiate program that I was proud to carry on the tradition with so many awesome friends over the years.  It is a decision well worth pondering. 

I  want to share how I met my sorority and how I met my husband.... both lifelong commitments that I am incredibly devoted to still today... 20 years later.  Certainly some added acknowledgements being shared here too that are so well deserved but don't even scratch the surface of the friendships I've made along the way.

I was sure I wanted to join a sorority even while I was in high school... watching movies and tv shows and reading in books about the fun and closeness they all had.  I am pretty sure that those Sweet Valley High books my friends and I read throughout the 80s lent to my desire for a close group of women I could call sisters since I had none of my own- growing up with only three older brothers.

Rollins College 1992

When I arrived at college in Fall 1992 it was a beautiful campus and the sorority houses were gorgeous.  A very smart decision had been made by the campus to not allow for formal recruitment until spring, especially so that freshmen could get into a routine and focus on scholastics and being on our own for the first time.  I had become friends with some Phi Mu's and Chi Omega's and was sure I wanted to join one of their sororities come spring.  Sadly I chose to transfer out of Rollins College and head back down to South Florida and be closer to family before I could go through rush there.  A decision I was incredibly sad about at the time but enthusiastically thrilled about when I look back.  Getting to spend the extra last few years closer to my mom who had been diagnosed with cancer was a huge blessing and worth the change in schools.  It was my destiny to start anew at FAU.  I thank God every day for that fate. 

Rollins College Campus Photos from google

When I began orientation at Florida Atlantic University in August 1993 I was quite a bit bummed out to say the least.  Gone were the ivy colored walls, the adorable quaint classrooms of one of the oldest colleges in Florida..... gone were the friends I had made and the ornate Annie Russell theater I got to be in the musical Candide in.... gone were the brick paved sidewalks and beautiful Lake Virginia and Fox Day and ohhh so many great places and people.   Replaced with concrete and a 60s style campus that was in no way my first choice.... this was not looking good at all to me and I was starting to debate my decision and consider my options elsewhere as I walked the campus.

FAU breezeway

FAU library

And by the way, over the years boy did the campus change and grow and become absolutely beautiful...... hosting Presidential debates and world leaders, amazing professors and incredible programs.... not to mention a bowl winning football team on top of various other accolades.  Here are some current day shots that make me feel better about the concrete school that turned into paradise of sorts now down in Boca Raton, Fl.

So, back to August 1993.... a mere twenty years ago this summer......

My orientation was full of walking those cold concrete breezeways and running into old high school friends and picking my major and finding myself in a sea of clubs hosting tables in the hall looking for perspective new members.  When I first spied the penguins on the table I was hooked..... could it be that the mascot and animal I had already a growing collection of.... the one that my oldest brother had also loved and therefore it was to be my favorite too..... There it was- the cute plush penguins and standing behind that table were the words Theta Phi Alpha.  And the irony continued..... here was my friend Melanie wearing those TPA letters smiling back at me.... Melanie had been in my brothers class just ahead of mine throughout middle and high school and we both recognized each other right away.  There was a glimmer of hope among the "Burrowing Owls" of Florida Atlantic.  The coincidences did not end there..... their Patron was St. Catherine of Siena whom I had been named after.... they were originally founded as a sorority for Catholic women in 1912 and were now open to all denominations... personally I was raised as a Catholic and although I no longer follow it 'religiously' the irony was not lost on me and my spirituality remains strong today as St. Catherine and Saint Kateri continue to guide me... but that is a post for another day......

BN sisters in the breezeway helping promote TPA

Rush (now called Recruitment) was going to be held in a few weeks and it was a serious process of  getting to meet everyone and all sides picking who they wanted and being matched up.  But before that, it was the first day to actually move onto campus a week or so before school was to start.  I met my new roommates 3 of the 4 who would become my sisters. Unbeknownst to me, that night was THE night though.



My roomies: Leslie (AZD), Kristen, Myself and Melissa (TPA)

My new roomies had invited some fraternity guys over who had helped them move in earlier in the day... we were going to hang out.  My boyfriend at the time (Jim) was helping me move in and stayed for the festivities.  When everyone went around the room and introduced themselves someone caught me eye.  I know they say there is no such thing as love at first sight, and I certainly didn't know at the time that I was going to love anyone new anytime soon.... the guy I was with already was a great guy and a good friend and I cared deeply about him.   But.... again there was that flash in the eyes of this college guy across the room and I wanted to know more about him.  I really liked his personality and the way he held himself.  After a while I called over to him and said,  "Hey your name again was Robert, right?"  And he answered with a smile, "Right, and you're Cathy right?"  Innocent...simple  and instantly putting a stamp on my heart.

Later on when everyone had left and my new roomies were hanging around chatting up about the evening, one of them asked us all which guy we thought was cute....we all found ourselves "picking" one we liked the best.  I quickly laid dibs on Robert :)   But you have a boyfriend!!!  "Yes... but I am not married and I can still find someone else's personality attractive," I said, and thought about how tough it may be for me to be in school  40 minutes away from the guy I had been with the past year and what the future would hold for us.  Within a week my boyfriend Jim and I parted our separate ways and albeit difficult at times we have stayed friends and from a distance watched each other's lives and relationships play out online and via mutual friends.  I wish him all of the love within me and am always so glad when I see him happy......

So, we went through rush and my roommate and one of our suitemates choose Theta Phi Alpha and Theta Phi Alpha chose us.    It was an interesting experience.  There were ups and downs during my time as a pledge sister- nothing at all like the movies and no horrible hazing or anything like that.  We had moments where we definitely felt badly and as a group had to defend each other or take the outcomes of the actions of a few as a team but again nothing that didn't make us closer and build a bond that friendships I had held earlier in life just didn't come close to.

The Delta Pledge class of Beta Nu at FAU, Fall 1993

 

Robert was fast becoming a friend of mine and his fraternity, Beta Theta Pi became the group of guys I gravitated towards as they were fun, funny, honest, loyal, gentlemen and definitely had a sense of down to earthiness that appealed to me.  When I went through rush Robert refused to tell me which group he thought what of and wanted me to make my own decisions.  His integrity and ability to flash his smile when I searched for hints was touching to me. One day when I hinted that I thought I was ready to start dating again after my breakup, "Well I know one thing for sure, any guy that ends up as 'the rebound' guy will miss out... it's the long term guy after that who will win in this with you."  I didn't know whether to be disappointed or determined or just plain impressed.  I swallowed that thought he gave me and moved on.... turns out there never was a rebound guy.  There never was any other guy, I just didn't know it yet.

Robert & Cathy at a luau social in 1994

 Boy did it drive my friends and his fraternity brothers crazy.... us being "friends" and not "going out-going out".  For 3 months Robert and I hung out all the time, getting to know each other like the best of friends.  When my roommate and all our friends went out Clubbing on Wednesdays we would go get a 12 pack of beer and sit around my room or somewhere on campus and just get to know each other-  learned everything about each other's past, family, relationships, you name it.  It was the single best decision in the world I have probably ever made was to become best friends first......

The Zeta Delta Chapter of Beta Theta Pi at FAU



Our Beta Nu Chapter of Theta Phi Alpha at FAU

Finally on a chilly October night after a fantastic party at our campus rathskeller bar hanging out with old and new friends Robert walked me back to my dorm and the first kiss happened.  I don't think either one of us were expecting it..... Things kind of fell into place after that kiss and we started sitting closer at events, holding hands and laughing intimately - it was finally apparent to everyone that what they had thought was meant to be all along was finally official.  We actually took our relationship quite slowly and were "dating" throughout the holidays and into the spring. It was incredible to know everything about each other without judgement before we started dating.  Our good friends understood us and certainly got many chuckles out of watching us debate against each other in Student Government.   

I particularly look back with fondness when I think about the times I was in tears after a sorority meeting or when something didn't go the way I thought it should.... as a pledge sister I was honestly ready to walk away one evening and Robert told me I just didn't "get it" yet and to wait it out and eventually everything would make sense to me.  I did not believe him one cents worth but lo and behold he was right.  (Be sure to see the video I made that I attached to the bottom of this blog post)

My time as a collegian was spent achieving honors status in my classes and adding two minors to my degree, I truly enjoyed my criminal justice and political science classes.  I began holding "offices" in my sorority such as song chair, ritual chair, Secretary and eventually Vice President.  I was extremely involved in other campus activities such as Student Government and the Criminal Justice Club and the College  Democrats (which led me to getting to meet the President and Vice President of the U.S.A.- see my celebrity blog post for more about that....) Over the years my bonds with my sisters grew stronger.... going through the things "kids" in the early twenties go through and helping each other cope with life.  It was during this time that my mom's cancer left, came back and left again...... sisters were going through their own dramas and real life scary times.  I won't get into details but suffice it to say, we saw it all...you name it and it happened to someone I knew and therefore happened to all of us.  Robert and I had our share of getting along and not getting along.... but we never dated anyone else during all that time and eventually we got engaged.  We decided to wait to get married until after I graduated so we could focus on the right priorities and that was a pretty smart decision in retrospect.  Those 5 years of dating were very helpful to our communication skills and getting to know each other so well before getting married & moving in together.

Theta Phi Crush Party circa 1994

Betas serenading me at a party circa 1994

 It was a fun time during those 4 years at FAU and I will cherish them until the day I die.  The most rewarding times with my sisters and of course with my soon-to-be-husband were yet to come though..... the dearest memories were made long after those 4 years at college.

 

My sisters became my closest friends, my little sister Patty and I got our first apartment together and were thrilled to be reconnected to each other in college since we had been friends in kindergarten and first grade and then ended up in different schools until she appeared at FAU too.  Some of my best friends then are still some of my closest friends today despite being thousands of miles away.  We have been to countless weddings of our sisters and brothers... and we have been thrilled to see 5 of my own sisters marry 5 of Robert's fraternity brothers too! 

Debbie Hoekzema Lipsccomb's wedding

 

Loni Stone Boyum's Wedding

Krysti Mazzeo Payne's Wedding

 

Cathy Sniegocki Billoni's Wedding

My very closest friends were there fore me when my mom passed and they were my sisters... sending white roses to the funeral and being there and comforting me when I needed it most.  My sisters and I have traveled to each other's homes on vacations, been to so many cities together it is mindboggling, taken care of each other's children & pets, been there through thick and thin..... attended leadership conferences and conventions and volunteered endless hours and served together as advisors and National Officers.  Even when I took a year break away from being involved nationally and locally in Theta Phi Alpha two of my best friends invited to me to join them and become Chapter Advisor for Alpha Tau in Daytona and help them through some stuff they were going through..... it brought me back in to the folds (thank you Krysti and Debbie!) 


And that is a great lead in to this section about gratitude..... to my roommates for inviting over the guys that first night of college and introducing me to Robert- the love of my life.....  For my big sister Holly - thank you for EVERY thing over the years- a sister IS a forever friend..... Thank you to my little sisters Patty, Nicole, Trish - you are such cool family to have.... and my adopted littles as the Beta pledge class of the reinstated Beta Upsilon Chapter at Saint Leo when I was their Colony Advisor especially our 2 incredible leaders who got it all re-started - Nikki and Rachelle- you are an inspiration to me.... and I love you both like real blood sisters.

Rachelle, Cathy and Nikki when they were pledge sisters at BY

The Beta Upsilon Chapter at Saint Leo reinstated after two long years of hard work, I loved being your Advisor!

 

To my fellow Grand Council members for the 2006-2008 term and 2008-2012 terms - for inspiring me and working along with me to make TPA an even more incredible National Fraternity.  Serving as our very first National Vice President of Alumnae was such an honor and I learned so much and hope I grew the fraternity in a new way  - it was a lifetime experience that I will always remember fondly.

-Mari Ann, Kathy, Dianne, Allison, Jennifer, Karen, Amy, Michelle and Laura.

Being installed on Grand Council 2006

Being installed again on Grand Council in 2008

To my best friends throughout my young alumnae years and the women with whom I learned to drink wine with and deal with husbands with (heck and we all first got married within the same few years too, come to think of it) and learned about being a grown up with - Debbie, Loni and Krysti... a friendship that knows no end.... 

 To Kristin Henkenious for being a great mentor as I learned how to be on Grand Council and to become the NVPA and to Emily for allowing us to create the first NES and for Jeanne Ross for being a great inspiration to me when I became National Song Chair and started our First National Chorus.....

Thanks to Becky McLaren for helping start the Beta Nu chapter and being an advisor and mentor and friend for many years.  And thanks to some of the many additional women who lead today who work so hard behind the scenes and deserve so much more recognition but refuse to take it- you truly are the definition of lifelong commitment... so many to name but particularly Kathy Sullivan, Leslie Trehant,  Christine O'Brien and I could on and on and on.....  to all those who continue to inspire with your lifelong commitments both young and old - thank you!

Krysti and I with Miss Ruth and Miss Jean, precious memories

And last but not least to my fellow convention roomies and awesome friends and sisters from BN who I am cherishing new amazing milestones and memories with (And yes some are repetitive but that's how I roll)... my big sis, my grandma and my cousin.... Krysti, Erika and Holly..... thank you for being my sisters and my friend yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Erika, Holly, Krysti and I sitting on the very steps our Founders' did at the old house in Ann Arbor, Michigan when we attended the Centennial Celebration Convention in 2012

 

Throughout it all, the commitment I saw in each one of us sisters (and even in Rob's fraternity brothers as well) died away at some points in our lives.... just like they do in a relationship.... you have your good days and your bad.  You have the times you just need a break and if there truly is a love between you and that person or that organization they will let you take your time and space and will have open arms for you when you are ready to come back and be an active part again.  It happens to all of us.... the smart and lucky ones are the ones that come back. 



Our Centennial Celebration of 100 years in Ann Arbor Michigan 2012

My sorority and my marriage taught me so many things that I doubt I would have appropriately learned in such a clear way.... standing up for what is right, doing what is wrong when you know you can get away with it and learning about consequences, learning to say I'm sorry, learning to listen and put others before yourself, charity being incredibly important, that time and treasure are no where's near as important as giving it away, and that love forgives and friendship is precious and breakable and fixable.

Holly (Grits), Cathy ( Vice), and Kristy (Maz) in Ann Arbor

A beautiful needlepoint my big sis Holly made me

 As current President of my local Alumnae Association and as the National Business Continuity Coordinator for my sorority, I see a lot of fresh motivated faces ready to pitch in and I see a lot of tired and unappreciated souls who need the motivation and friendship to bring them back on board..... encouragement and appreciation are the tools that will help a lost lamb find her way home.

Central Florida Alumnae Association celebrating Founders' Day 2013

Think about the lifetime commitments you have made, and maybe the ones you may have walked away from.  Is it time to go back, even if just to say hello to one person you used to be connected closely with... or I'm sorry to someone you may have hurt years ago..... or to check in on someone and just see how they are doing?  If you love something, set it free, if it was meant to be it will come back to you at the right time in the right place. 

And if you still say you WERE in a sorority/fraternity and don't say I am still IN one, then take a look at this video my sister Krysti and I made ... maybe it will bring you back home too........

 

Just like my husband-to-be told me..... "Someday it will all make sense, and you will get IT."

20 years together 15 years married.....a life time of commitment. 

I love you Bobert!